If you follow me on social media, you may already know I’ve been in a funk the last couple of days. It was my Granddaughter’s second birthday on Wednesday; and as I’m in Bali and she’s in New Zealand; I obviously didn’t get to spent the day with her.
I knew this was coming, and thought that I was prepared for the feels that I would feel. However, the intensity of the emotions blindsided me; and I found myself feeling much more down than I had expected to.
It has been a few days since then; and I’m now feeling much better. But I have to admit; I was in a real slump for a moment there. I missed my little moko - as well as the rest of the family - intensely. I have experienced homesickness ever since I got here; but this was much worse. I longed to be with them more than ever; and spent time mourning each milestone that I am missing. I felt disconnected, distant and lonely.
As I have been through several bouts of depression; the intense sadness that I was feeling had me worried. I was initially scared that I might be relapsing. You see, what I was feeling felt a lot like depression. It can be difficult to tell the difference between depression and simply feeling low. Sometimes the two feel very similar. The sadness that I was feeling lifted after a few days; which was a huge relief. This let me know that, despite the deep distress that I had been feeling; I had actually been dealing with sadness, and not depression.
There are some ways that you can tell which is which.
Feeling low is a normal human emotion. One which all of us feel some times during our lives. We experience it when we are going through stressful or sad times.
Feeling low is usually linked to an event, or something that happens to us e.g. an argument, hard times at work, or the death of a loved one.
Although we may feel a strong sense of sadness over these events; it can usually be relieved by crying, venting to someone; or simply riding it out. Thankfully; the feeling of being low usually passes over time. This is what differentiates it from depression. If a low mood doesn’t pass, it can be a sign of depression.
Here are some symptoms that people with depression may experience:
- A sad, hopeless or depressed daily mood, that lasts most of the time.
- An increased amount of sleepiness or napping; or alternatively, insomnia or hardly sleeping.
- A feeling of lethargy, or noticeably low energy.
- Experiencing feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness.
- Scrambled thoughts, and problems making decisions.
- A loss of interest in activities that you would usually enjoy.
- Wanting to withdraw from others and be alone.
- Thinking about or planning suicide.
If any of the symptoms above last longer than two weeks, you should visit a doctor to determine whether it is depression or not.
If you are thinking about or planning suicide, don’t wait. Visit a doctor immediately.
Although there is a difference between feeling low and depression; if left unchecked; sadness can ultimately turn into depression. It’s really important to keep in touch with your feelings and listen to yourself; so that you can adequately assess where you are at.
As I have experienced several bouts of depression; I have to be extra vigilant to make sure I don’t relapse.
Moving to Bali has been a huge part of my decision to put my wellbeing first. The tropical weather, the creative setting and the slower, more spiritual pace of life have all done wonders for my wairua.
However; you don’t have to move to a foreign country to take better care of yourself. There are simpler methods to use when you are feeling low.
Here are 20 quick and easy ways to keep sadness in check, and keep depression at bay:
Identify, address and (ideally) eliminate the things that trigger your stress.
Take a short fifteen minute walk to get the ‘feel good’ chemicals flowing.
Avoid processed meats, ready-made meals and junk foods.
Eat healthy whole foods, fruits and vegetables.
Drink lots of water.
Avoid coffee and cola.
Try to go to bed at the same time each night.
Don’t use your phone for twenty minutes before bedtime.
Read a book in bed before you fall asleep.
Try ten minutes of quiet meditation.
Practice simple rhythmic breathing - in slowly through your nose, and out through your mouth.
Avoid alcohol and drugs.
Vent to someone you trust. Let your feelings out. Don’t bottle them up.
Cut back on social media time.
Connect with your friends and family - even if you don’t feel like it.
Don’t take on too much, and try not to overcommit yourself.
Stay away from toxic people who make you feel bad.
Avoid sugar.
Accept that some things can’t be changed, and focus on changing the things you can.
Remind yourself that this feeling will pass. Imagine it flowing through you.
Again, if you find that your low mood still isn’t lifting after a couple of weeks, there could be something more going on. Don’t be frightened or ashamed to seek help if this is the case. These days, dealing with your mental health is as simple as dealing with any other ailment. You wouldn’t hesitate to go to the doctor if you leg was broken; so try to think of this in the same way.
There is help out there.
Places To Get Help:
Lifeline (open 24/7) - 0800 543 354
Depression Helpline (open 24/7) - 0800 111 757
Healthline (open 24/7) - 0800 611 116
Samaritans (open 24/7) - 0800 726 666
Suicide Crisis Helpline (open 24/7) - 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO). This is a service for people who may be thinking about suicide, or those who are concerned about family or friends.
Youthline (open 24/7) - 0800 376 633. You can also text 234 for free between 8am and midnight, or email talk@youthline.co.nz
0800 WHATSUP children's helpline - phone 0800 9428 787 between 1pm and 10pm on weekdays and from 3pm to 10pm on weekends. Online chat is available from 7pm to 10pm every day at www.whatsup.co.nz.
Kidsline (open 24/7) - 0800 543 754. This service is for children aged 5 to 18. Those who ring between 4pm and 9pm on weekdays will speak to a Kidsline buddy. These are specially trained teenage telephone counsellors.
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